5. Today I will pray to speak only STRONG words, words that make these children feel strong. Grace words. Grace is the only non-toxic air. All other words I breathe are death words.
Strong words, grace words are so important to us because we truly believe that the power of life and death is in the tongue. We can speak both blessing and cursing over and into the lives of our children. We as parents must choose to speak blessing and grace. Our children will thrive in an atmosphere of grace.
Speaking only strong words is not just a practice but a habit we are developing with several measures and action steps to insure our success.
1. Whenever we feel that we will say something toxic or weakening to our children or, as husband and wife, to each other, we simply stop. We say nothing. There is no shame in silence. There is no pain or toxicity in silence.
2. At least once a day, we bless our children. Spoken blessing is powerful! I highly recommend the book Imparting the Blessing by Ligon.
3. We praise our children at every opportunity. Sometimes praise for the smallest accomplishment or progress is the springboard to great achievement.
4. We pray for each of our children daily, out loud, by name. Not only do they know that we love them enough to mention them to our Father but, their faith increases as they see our prayers for them answered. They even begin to ask for prayer in specific areas.
5. When we mess up, we apologize and ask for forgiveness. It is humbling to ask our children for forgiveness.
6. As husband and wife, we hold each other accountable for the words spoken in our home. We also hold the children accountable for the way they speak to each other. Everyone has the right to say, your words are hurting me. This can be delicate territory as sometimes, the truth hurts but, it can be spoken in love.
May our children breath in the clean air of grace and flourish under the blessing!
About a year ago I read Ann Voskamp's blog for the first time. I fell in love with her writing style and her heart that shines through her words. After consuming every part of her blog in just a couple of days, I happened upon her Parenting Manifesto of Joy. I read it several times and then printed it. I posted a copy in my office near my computer so I could read it every morning before I wake my children. The above review is based on one point of that Manifesto.
Showing posts with label Parenting. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Parenting. Show all posts
Saturday, January 21, 2012
Wednesday, January 18, 2012
Joyful Parenting Review ~ Day 4
4. Today, when stress mounts, I pray to dismount it with gratitude. My stress management plan will be verbal thanks. I can feel only one feeling at a time, and I choose to give thanks at all times. Fight feeling with feeling!
This one has been the biggest life changer for me and the key is one simple word – VERBAL! Gratitude must be shown outwardly and expressed verbally.
When we appreciate something someone has done for us or given to us, we say thank you. We speak our thanks. We do not assume that they will know that we are thankful. We do not expect them to read our minds. The same should be true when we are thankful for the gifts and mercies of our Father.
When we speak our thanks not only do we impact ourselves but those around us. As mothers, we have the opportunity to speak life into our children. When they hear us being thankful, even in difficult and stressful situations, it is life-giving and even life changing for them.
By this simple practice the culture of our home is transformed from one of stress, doubt and faithlessness into a culture of abundance, joy and gratitude. Giving thanks allows me to be more joyful with my husband, children and all those I come in contact with.
Based on this principal I have even added a gratitude list to my children’s Daily Notebook.
About a year ago I read Ann Voskamp's blog for the first time. I fell in love with her writing style and her heart that shines through her words. After consuming every part of her blog in just a couple of days, I happened upon her Parenting Manifesto of Joy. I read it several times and then printed it. I posted a copy in my office near my computer so I could read it every morning before I wake my children. The above review is based on one point of that Manifesto.
This one has been the biggest life changer for me and the key is one simple word – VERBAL! Gratitude must be shown outwardly and expressed verbally.
When we appreciate something someone has done for us or given to us, we say thank you. We speak our thanks. We do not assume that they will know that we are thankful. We do not expect them to read our minds. The same should be true when we are thankful for the gifts and mercies of our Father.
When we speak our thanks not only do we impact ourselves but those around us. As mothers, we have the opportunity to speak life into our children. When they hear us being thankful, even in difficult and stressful situations, it is life-giving and even life changing for them.
By this simple practice the culture of our home is transformed from one of stress, doubt and faithlessness into a culture of abundance, joy and gratitude. Giving thanks allows me to be more joyful with my husband, children and all those I come in contact with.
Based on this principal I have even added a gratitude list to my children’s Daily Notebook.
About a year ago I read Ann Voskamp's blog for the first time. I fell in love with her writing style and her heart that shines through her words. After consuming every part of her blog in just a couple of days, I happened upon her Parenting Manifesto of Joy. I read it several times and then printed it. I posted a copy in my office near my computer so I could read it every morning before I wake my children. The above review is based on one point of that Manifesto.
Monday, January 16, 2012
Joyful Parenting ~ Day 3
3. Today, I will not have any emergencies. There are no emergencies! Only amateurs hurry.
It took me a few times reading this one to get it, really get it. I got caught up in the thoughts of the emergencies that I have each day. You know, the ones that leave us running breathless through the house and speeding down the freeway late for every appointment we have.
My mind seemed to want to argue with this whole concept. There was flood of “what about this” and “isn’t this considered?”
Finally, I got it. Nothing happens in my day that my Father doesn’t know about. He is aware of all that is happening and He is in complete control of it all. He knew that as soon as I was ready to walk out the door for a doctor’s appointment, the baby would have one of those massive blow out poops and need to be cleaned up and completely redressed. He knew that the three year old would sneak out the front door to go play with the chickens with no shoes or jacket. He also knew I would panic when I realized he was no longer playing in the clean socks. He knew about the call I would get in the middle of the night that my husband was hurt on the job.
If I truly believe that He is sovereign then, why hurry? If my Father has is already on the scene protecting my children, caring for my husband and showing me favor then why rush?
It took me a few times reading this one to get it, really get it. I got caught up in the thoughts of the emergencies that I have each day. You know, the ones that leave us running breathless through the house and speeding down the freeway late for every appointment we have.
My mind seemed to want to argue with this whole concept. There was flood of “what about this” and “isn’t this considered?”
Finally, I got it. Nothing happens in my day that my Father doesn’t know about. He is aware of all that is happening and He is in complete control of it all. He knew that as soon as I was ready to walk out the door for a doctor’s appointment, the baby would have one of those massive blow out poops and need to be cleaned up and completely redressed. He knew that the three year old would sneak out the front door to go play with the chickens with no shoes or jacket. He also knew I would panic when I realized he was no longer playing in the clean socks. He knew about the call I would get in the middle of the night that my husband was hurt on the job.
If I truly believe that He is sovereign then, why hurry? If my Father has is already on the scene protecting my children, caring for my husband and showing me favor then why rush?
Monday, January 2, 2012
Joyful Parenting ~ Day 2
2. Today I will transfigure all things into beauty, and I will refuse to see anything else.
This one was difficult for me. I am not an overly negative person. Typically, I am a “glass half full” kind of girl, but it’s not always easy, as a mom, to find the beauty in the juice spilled on the kitchen floor or the chocolate stains on the couch. We can’t always see the artistry in the masterpiece drawn on the bedroom wall or the loveliness of the finger prints on the windows. Temper tantrums of toddlers don’t always sound like a symphony to our ears and the arguments of brothers and sisters are far from the sounds of sonnets recited. The endless strings of “Mom, I need ….” never seem to make us catch our breath in wonder and awe but there is beauty to be found in each one if we choose to see it.
The juice may have been spilled by a six year old now independent enough to pour her own drink when the doctors said that she would never live, much less walk. The chocolate stains may be from a little boy with growth issues who now taking in more than is required calories for the day thanks to some Nestle Quick. The masterpiece on the bedroom wall may be better than any poster you could have offered the 10 year old boy to decorate his room because he is incredibly gifted. The fingerprints on the freshly washed windows may be from a girl who can’t stand to miss a moment of what is going on with the animals outside.
There is a precious beauty in it all.
Find the Ann Voskamp's complete Parenting Manifesto of Joy here.
This one was difficult for me. I am not an overly negative person. Typically, I am a “glass half full” kind of girl, but it’s not always easy, as a mom, to find the beauty in the juice spilled on the kitchen floor or the chocolate stains on the couch. We can’t always see the artistry in the masterpiece drawn on the bedroom wall or the loveliness of the finger prints on the windows. Temper tantrums of toddlers don’t always sound like a symphony to our ears and the arguments of brothers and sisters are far from the sounds of sonnets recited. The endless strings of “Mom, I need ….” never seem to make us catch our breath in wonder and awe but there is beauty to be found in each one if we choose to see it.
The juice may have been spilled by a six year old now independent enough to pour her own drink when the doctors said that she would never live, much less walk. The chocolate stains may be from a little boy with growth issues who now taking in more than is required calories for the day thanks to some Nestle Quick. The masterpiece on the bedroom wall may be better than any poster you could have offered the 10 year old boy to decorate his room because he is incredibly gifted. The fingerprints on the freshly washed windows may be from a girl who can’t stand to miss a moment of what is going on with the animals outside.
There is a precious beauty in it all.
Find the Ann Voskamp's complete Parenting Manifesto of Joy here.
Thursday, October 20, 2011
Joyful Parenting ~ Day 1
About a year ago I read Ann Voskamp's blog for the first time. I fell in love with her writing style and her heart that shines through her words. After consuming every part of her blog in just a couple of days, I happened upon her Parenting Manifesto of Joy. I read it several times and then printed it. I posted a copy in my office near my computer so I could read it every morning before I wake my children. Recently, I put a copy on our daily clipboard so I could flip to it at any moment of the day and remind myself of my ultimate goals with my family.
I thought we could take some time over the next ten days and share our thoughts about the 10 points of the manifesto and how we can bring joy to our parenting.
"1. Today I will make our home a house of prayer. I will pray at set times. I will invite our children to come move into an interior space that lives with God."
Don't we need this? Isn't this absolutely essential for us and for our children?
In order to make our home a house of prayer, we must pray. Our prayer life cannot be suffering and dried up. I think of prayer somewhat like a phone conversation. If you are calling someone that you rarely speak to, there is a lot of time in the beginning of the call in just introducing yourself, catching up and sometimes making apology for how long it has been since your last call. It is not this way with people you call frequently. When I call my best friend, I never have to say who I am, she knows. I don't have to ask how she is doing, I know. I can tell by the tone of her voice how her day is and if she needs me and she can do the same. There is no awkwardness. Sometimes we don't even have to say hello. Our lives feel like one seamless conversation. I can pick up thoughts we had a few days back and the conversation keeps on going without reminder or review. This is how it can be when we are constantly in communication with our Father. He invites us to this relationship and our children see it and feel it.
Even when the conversation between us and our Father flows throughout the day, we still need special times to meet with him; planned times where distractions should be minimal. Though my husband and I talk our way through the day, we see each other each evening and we discuss all of the issues around the house as the needs arise, we still need time away together where we can really focus on our conversation. For us to have this time, we must plan it and be intentional about it. We know that every night when the children go to bed, we will purposefully take some time to recap the day, talk about tomorrow and just be with each other. We need this so much more with our Heavenly Father.
When we are purposefully and actively in conversation and communion with the Lord, the space around us changes. When we invite our children to follow in that example, our home beats with new life; fresh air that is life to us all. Our spouses and children can feel the difference in our homes. People who visit can feel the difference in a house that lives with God.
May the air that our children breath be saturated with God and may the fresh breath of air that greets our visitors be the gentle wind of the Holy Spirit.
I thought we could take some time over the next ten days and share our thoughts about the 10 points of the manifesto and how we can bring joy to our parenting.
"1. Today I will make our home a house of prayer. I will pray at set times. I will invite our children to come move into an interior space that lives with God."
Don't we need this? Isn't this absolutely essential for us and for our children?
In order to make our home a house of prayer, we must pray. Our prayer life cannot be suffering and dried up. I think of prayer somewhat like a phone conversation. If you are calling someone that you rarely speak to, there is a lot of time in the beginning of the call in just introducing yourself, catching up and sometimes making apology for how long it has been since your last call. It is not this way with people you call frequently. When I call my best friend, I never have to say who I am, she knows. I don't have to ask how she is doing, I know. I can tell by the tone of her voice how her day is and if she needs me and she can do the same. There is no awkwardness. Sometimes we don't even have to say hello. Our lives feel like one seamless conversation. I can pick up thoughts we had a few days back and the conversation keeps on going without reminder or review. This is how it can be when we are constantly in communication with our Father. He invites us to this relationship and our children see it and feel it.
Even when the conversation between us and our Father flows throughout the day, we still need special times to meet with him; planned times where distractions should be minimal. Though my husband and I talk our way through the day, we see each other each evening and we discuss all of the issues around the house as the needs arise, we still need time away together where we can really focus on our conversation. For us to have this time, we must plan it and be intentional about it. We know that every night when the children go to bed, we will purposefully take some time to recap the day, talk about tomorrow and just be with each other. We need this so much more with our Heavenly Father.
When we are purposefully and actively in conversation and communion with the Lord, the space around us changes. When we invite our children to follow in that example, our home beats with new life; fresh air that is life to us all. Our spouses and children can feel the difference in our homes. People who visit can feel the difference in a house that lives with God.
May the air that our children breath be saturated with God and may the fresh breath of air that greets our visitors be the gentle wind of the Holy Spirit.
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